I watched some House series( 3episodes to be exact) online just now...it was a good show despite the fact we dont even understand the medical jargons they are using..perhaps that way makes the wow effect of that series..anyway it wasnt something i wanna talk abt today obviously..

It has been some really long time since i wrote any blog..and its weird to do it after so long..my hands feel stiff..i feel that..i have nothing worth talking about recently...i just realised that i have nothing good to talk about even back then, not to mention right now..all i talk about is only this guy that fella..that bitch..stupid dreams..failed secret admirations..gosh...do i seriously have nothing worth talking about?and im not talking about politics or even world peace...

I did something very dumb just now..i type my name and those ppl i noe in yahoo search box...wow i found a lot things...like this fella did some thesis and it was put online..then i found out my ex and the wife profiles in some church internal magazines...and he wrote " im glad ive fulfilled her dream to open a nursery.." All of a sudden i realise that im sucha failure...and he left me for sucha better person than me..at least she has dreams that has meanings and i hv none! gosh..i am feeling slightly low..

You guys might think that im jealous over her or something..neah..im certainly better looking than her...alot!

It just that..i feel so useless..going thru everyday without a meaning...without a better reason to live besides shopping for nice and affordable clothes..eating my fave steamboat and japanese korean food..whats left in my life besides that?

Ok im taking swimming lessons and ....thats it! Completely nothing else!

I thought of danny the other day...wondering how he'll be doing without me.I should have realised that ppl move on! He moved on so should I! Why am I so buggered about this guy? Hello??!!

I thought of Blaze last nite..and i cried...i regretted his death..but i have somehow gotten over it..

So what;s next?

My plan..is to take up some real good dancing class besides my yoga and swimming..i needed it...Ive realised that throughout my life ive love performing...but sadly i never did so..only some choir group that i used to join back then in primary school...i love standing out in a crowd..i like ppl noticing me..i hate being the wallflowers..like ive been for the past whatsoever years!

I wish i can help out on some charity works...i believe what you give is what you take later on..ohh..dont everyone think the same? hmm..the time will come...

take k everyone...im thinking whether to post this in friendster...its no fun writing this without anyone knowing..:D